Saturday, June 5, 2021

~ Lost It All..~

 “There is no one at home now…I go and cook for myself, Covid has devastated my life – I had no money to provide for hospitalization or Oxygen Cylinder when my wife and brother died in my arms.”

This poignant story of a rickshaw puller which I boarded today shows the grit of human endeavor to live life come what may. Though Shambhu has openly admitted that he thought of killing himself out of depression but at the last moment some voice made him stop.

“Don’t know what made me stop Sir!” he told me as we forged a connect whilst he was taking me way back home. Today was his day of speaking, to puke his emotions on someone whom he thought gave him a patient hearing – I consider myself blessed and humbled to know the nadir of humanity which Shambu told me.

“Bhaiya, I put my wife in my rickshaw and took her to a government hospital in my vicinity – she fainted on the doorstep out of breathlessness but the guard simply did not let us enter – after some time, a doctor and a healthcare worker came and declared her dead. I could not believe that my destiny had turned so cruel towards me!”

“Bhaiya, being poor and powerless in this world is the worst punishment, as no one listens to you and everyone just shoo you away as filth! We are poor and struggle everyday for our survival. We could not afford doctor’s fee or high-cost medicines and thus have to be dependent on government run hospitals.”

After a brief silences, he again continued … “One week later, I lost my brother, who was also suffering from Covid and for whom I was not able to arrange Oxygen cylinder – He died in my arms in my jugghi (makeover Shanti)” – ridding pillion, I was just listening to the tale of a man who had lost his family out of human insensitivity. I had no better words of comfort than telling him “ Shambhu bhaiya, it was all God’s will.” – though I knew fully well that we as humans did not try and did our best to save his family’s life – We blamed God as that is the easy way out.

“Will you go home now after dropping me Shambhu?” – I asked.

“No bhaiya, I wont go home, the moment I will go home, I will deep dive into fateful memories of my wife and my brother – I only had them as my family and there is no one left now for me to go home. I will sleep in my rickshaw and would go home early morning to take bath and freshen me up to begin my day again.”

I asked him one more question –“Shambhu, from where you get the zeal to live and look towards a better tomorrow?”

He did not speak a word and I presumed that he might not have listened to my question midst the hush-hush of vehicular moment. I repeated the same question but to no avail. Though I felt offended at the gesture shown to me but I understood his dilemma of thoughts and kept quiet. There was no further conversation with Shambhu throughout my journey.

Soon I had arrived at my destination and hurriedly got off to pay Shambhu for his services and lo!. I could see his wet eyes and he was crying silently whilst he drove. I swiftly tried to engage him in the worldly talk and made him remind of his boldness to counter the situation life had thrown him into.

“Shambhu bhaiya, very less people have the courage to live life alone – that too when they have lost their near and dear ones in close interval of time. You are bold and strong and an example for many of people like me who would listen to your story of guts!, I know what you have lost, for I have been in your boat sometime back.” , telling this I paid him and took his phone no - for I want to be in touch with such a man who is a tower of inspiration for me to live on despite being alone and enduring his pain silently. 

As I am writing this now, I can clearly envision what my friend must be doing at this midnight hour – I am sending him my prayers and wishes for I want to see him a family man again – a prerequisite for every one of us to live beautifully in this world full of unexpected happenings and mishaps…

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